This feels like some sage-level shit. Or at least something I hear people older than myself say quite frequently. I hit a major low point after not doing as well in university as I wanted. Grades were slipping and it felt like my dreams were fading and possibilities were falling from the sky I held them in because of my own failures. _ It took awhile, but eventually I realized that the majority of people who make decisions that hurt me did not consider my feelings, my being, or my worth in what they did. A breakup, being turned down from a job opportunity, a rejection letter from school, whatever it is, I would say it likely has NOTHING to do with us. _ People make decisions in their own self interest, thinking of their own energy, resources, time , etc. It’s not that we aren’t good enough, it’s not that we are less than, it’s really just people making the best investment for them. _ Not being enough is the narrative we tell ourselves too answer our “why (me)?” question. We’re so distraught by not understanding the reality we’re in and how we fit in it so we have to have a story. Sadly, we choose a story that dims our light, dulls our abilities and sharpness, and subjects us to lower value. _ It took me until this week and hitting some low points that there’s factors in life that are way fucking bigger than I am. As I struggled in school, I realize this system doesn’t give a shit about me - I’m just someone in the system. And it liberated me. _ It’s not personal, it’s not a personal vendetta, it’s just systems at work bigger than myself. So why waste time trying to fight against a force that doesn’t consider me and use that same energy to ride the waves and purpose I’m trying to make for myself?